The forgotten art of The Artist Date (or Solo Artist Date as I call it)
An important long forgotten skill and yet something that gets overlooked in the constant busyness that is daily life.
How have we forgotten to enjoy our own company and more importantly peace and quiet?
We live in a constantly connected and information overloaded world where we have access to all the information and products we could ever need. Sometimes switching off and taking time to reset can really help to recharge the batteries and give you time and space in a busy season of life.
"All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone," wrote the French philosopher Blaise Pascal.
When was the last time you allowed yourself to sit down and slow down? And to just be with your thoughts and the space around you?
This is exactly why I love going to coffee shops and enjoying a cup of coffee whilst just allowing my mind to wander. Sometimes I people watch, sometimes I read, other times I draft content or journal. The point is with these solo expeditions there are no rules other than to carve out a block of time just for me.
What is an Artist Date??
The concept of an Artist date comes from Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way. Don’t be put off by the title – it is meant for every single person in all walks of life no matter what you do for a job.
Julia believes we are all born creatively talented and it’s simply that we do not spend the time to really nurture that side of us. Her book is a 12 week program into bringing back creativity and really shifting the course of your life.
Her foundational tools are:
- Morning Pages – three pages of conscious writing and letting your thoughts spill out onto the paper
- Artist Dates – time spent solo
Then each chapter builds on to the previous one with creative exercises designed to help you move through your own internal blocks and to really free yourself.
The challenge of solo time
When you first start trying this out you might feel strange, I know I did the first time I sat in a coffee shop by myself. It was like my mind was expecting my best friend or colleague to turn up and I felt on edge. As human beings we are just not taught how to simply BE with our own minds. Sitting by yourself and relaxing can feel lonely if you are not used to it. It is a practice that takes time and gradually you find that solo time becomes an enjoyable experience. Sometimes it can still be uncomfortable for me when I go to a new café or smoothie bar. I find listening to music on my headphones helps me to relax. The familiarity of my favourite coffee shops also helps as I know the layout and where my favorite seat/table is.
Tips for easing into artist dates
Make it simple. It can be a straight forward as walking down the road outside your home on your own then walking back. It could be walking around the shopping centre and having a wander with background noise.
Finding things to focus on can help such as the way a hot cup of coffee tastes or noticing someone being kind to you and smiling back to them. All these things help to keep you present and in the moment which can really make you feel less alone and see artist dates differently. They can be real experience in relaxation and letting go of stress.